3/23 Dancing With Stars Review, No Dance off Required.

Last week had to be one of the most dull dancing shows we had seen. Nothing grabbed us until we were falling all over ourselves to find a horizontal position on the sofa to doze off.

This week was much different. The very same dancers that put us into a complete slumber last week week, sparked our consistent attention this.

1. Denise & Maks – the couple started off the show slow…and dull…and we thought, no, please. Denise had no unique and confident moves. She as playing follow the leader and the leader won. Denise is not our cup of tea. (4/10).

julianne_chuckwick2. Chuck & Julianne – Chuck showed that perseverance and hard work and preparation can bring the dead back to life. He danced with Jullianne like he was leading the pro that trained him. Chuck did an excellent job. (8/10)

3. Holly & Dmitry – Top Heavy Holly had a bit of problem getting her weight distribution right last week. She improved this week, but she is still a rather awkward dancer compared to the best in this group, especially when she has to break out of Dmitry’s grip. When he cannot guide her, she looks like a lost forest creature. And when she shakes, well, the upper body is completely out of control. Our advice, get a bra and practice more! (5/10)

4. Stave-O & Lacey – What hurt about this dance was Steve-O had it going through the first 10 seconds and lost his way. It could have been fatigue or stage fright, but a dance that was flowing and regal in the first few seconds soon lost its way and indeed because the Jack-Ass dance. (5/10)

5. Lawrence & Edyta – Lawrence was so much less rigid and so in step this week we think e should get extra credit. We cannot be sure, but we think he practiced overtime for this week and it showed. He isn’t the best, but he was quite respectable. (7/10)

6. Shawn & Mark – Shawn still looks like a little girl when they do her cameo on the computer, but she looks like anything but on the dance floor. The dresses she wears are showing she is filling out and is no longer the slim gymnast we saw in Beijing. Her dance talent must spring from her gymnastic champion background, because she looks like an absolute pro and is an obvious finalist. (9/10)

7. Gilles & Cheryl – This is one couple that looks like either dancer could be the professional. Gille is confident up on stage, which leads to some He also has incredible chemistry with Cheryl. They are a perfect match on the floor complementing each other’s moves to perfection. They look like they are having fun where so many others look like they are working. That effortless appeal can only come from talent, practice and pleasure in what they are doing. They were great this week and are obvious finalists. (9/10)

kym_davidalangrier8. David and Kym – We believe Kym is the best instructor in the competition. It appears that no matter what dancer she is given, that dancer excels. We would have liked to see her get Steve Wozniak because it would be interesting to see if she could pull him from the abyss. But getting David to perform the way he did tonight is no small feat. Kudos to David too for his obvious hard work. He had to do some solo moves in this and, while not professional in appearance, they weren’t all that horrible, and that takes work. The rest of the dance was well choreographed and pleasant to watch. David was right on step with Kym all the way. An extra point for being so greatly improved this week. (8/10)

9. Steve & Karina – No Hope. Steve looks like a school girl when he dances, a school girl with about 200 pounds of blubber on him. He tries, but he has no clue what he is doing and no amount of practice can save him. Fortunately, he doesn’t need this gig because he is going home. (2/10)

10. Melissa & Tony – Melissa is in a crowd of stars, and isn’t really a star herself…yet. She has a stunning smile, a grace about her that shows in every dance step, and is always dressed to kill. It is obvious from her grace in tonights dance that she is in this to win. Her kicks are so high, we think kung fu movies a strong possibility. If she does win this competition, it could lead to instant stardom. (9/10)

11. Lil Kim & Derek – Kim is short and buxom, making it difficult for her to be as graceful as some of the taller dancers. She is sexy and aggressive on the floor and brings a ton of energy to her dances. She has no problem keeping step with Derek, but does occasionally look to him for support, like a bookmark in the dance to remember where she left off. Great hip action in the dance gave her top marks, but one stumble leading to a missed move near the end means we cannot put her in the top group. The judges missed it though and scored her better than we. (7/10)

chelsie_tymurray12. Ty and Chelsie – Chelsie is turning out to be a great trainer. When Ty started, he was awkward and stiff. He looked the part of a rodeo cowboy (or maybe clown) kind of hopping about and trying to stay on the bull. But Chelsie has proven her star quality and brought Ty along for the ride. He is so improved that we were shocked this week. The only mistake in the dance was Chelsie’s. She uncharacteristically slipped on the wooden floor, but Ty alertly caught her before she hit the floor and continued smoothly into the next twirl. We loved this and Ty gets extra credit all around. (8/10)

To sum it up, with lowest score first:

1. Steve & Karina (2/10)
2. Denise & Maks (4/10)
3. Steve-O & Lacey (5/10)
3. Holly & Dmitry (5/10)
4. Lil’ Kim & Derek (7/10)
5. Lawrence & Edyta (7/10)

6. Ty & Chelsie (8/10)
7. David & Kym (8/10)
8. Chuck & Julianne (8/10)

9. Shawn & Mark (9/10)
10. Melissa & Tony (9/10)
11. Gilles & Cheryl (9/10)

There you have it. Steve W is way way out of his league. They shouldn’t even bother with a dance off. Just send the guy home.

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