3/17 Dancing With The Stars Results, Go-Go-Gone

We are not sure if it is this year’s performers, that the show is not aging well or if we miss Chloris Leachman, but however you cut it, last night put us in snooze mode.  At least one of us found ourselves in dreamland before the show was over.

We couldn’t even do a recap on that show. But here it is in a 2 minute clip, without the 2-hour cumbersome huhumm…

What do you do if you have a show that puts your audience to sleep??  Take the worst possible performers and have them do it again in a dance-off.  Great idea!!  ZZZZZZ.

It came down to Steve Wozniak versus Belinda Carlisle in a dance off. As we watched, we were begging for Cloris Leachman, these two are so bad.

Belinda was awful and just has no grace when dancing ballroom, which is surprising considering her past in the Go-Go’s.  This week, we are sorry to say she is a Go Go Goner.  Wozniak lives for another week, but there is little doubt he will be gone next week.

Our favorites are Melissa & Tony, Gilles & Cheryl, and Shawn and Mark who come across as more than half professional.  These are likley to be the top 3 couples, and don’t see anyone catching them.

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3/9 Dancing With The Stars: Comparing Apples and Oranges, Oranges Win

1 Lil’ Kim & Derek – While being a bit awkward in her first week, Kim did quite well. She has glamour and style, but she is also sexy. There is also a personality that shines though that brings her to the front of the line. Major distraction is she is short relative to Derek, and it makes her legs look awkward. Our score for her (8/10)

2 Belinda & Jonathan – Belinda was energetic with the Go-Go’s and so we expected energy in her dance. It wasn’t there. The slow dance is difficult to pull off early because it is inherently boring to watch unless you are superb and Belinda wasn’t. We will be kind. (6/10)

3 Lawrence & Edyta – Lawrence was a big black post. Not much movement, no soul, no personality at least during the dance. He was stiff and awkward, and he proved that he could not tackle this challenge. (5/10)

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Derek Hough and Lil' Kim

4 Steve-O & Lacey – It must be tough to constantly be called the Jack Ass. Of course, it is the symbol of the Democratic Party, so perhaps it is in style. Steve-O was stiff, but he made the moves when he had to to keep from looking as bad as Lawrence did. Not great. (5/10)

5 Gilles & Cheryl – OK, we had trouble discerning which dancer was the teacher and which was the student in this performance. Gille was the best of the night and is incredible with his grace and coordination. We think we have a winner. (9/10)

6 Chuck & Julianne – Nicely done, albeit a bit boring. The couple never caught our interest, but we have to give some kudos for the quality of the dance. (7/10)

7 Holly & Dmitry – Not enough practice, and it was evident. We are huge fans of Dmitri’s style so we think he will bring Holly into this competition, but at this point, she kept seeming to forget what she was doing. One minute we would think she was on track and hot, and the next we had no idea what she was doing, but it didn’t seem like dance. Holly only had 48 hours to rehearse a replacement for Jewel, who had to withdraw, and because she had her moments, she could definitely come back from this performance. (6/10)

8 Ty & Chelsie – The judges were harsh on Ty. He has a real cowboy stiffness about him he has to chake though, to come across as a serious ball room dancer. He has the ability to remember the moves, but is so stiff like he had broken every bone in his body riding the bulls. He also has this odd thing going on with his hands that make
him look like he is snapping his fingers. Grace, unfortunately was lacking. (5/10)

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Tony Dovolani and Melissa Rycroft

9 Shawn & Mark – Shawn did not look like this during the Olympics. She has matured and looks every bit the woman the others in the competition do. She has elegance and grace and uses her ability to remember her gymnastics moves to her advantage when recalling her steps in the dance. She occasionally looks like she is completing a floor dance or other gymnastics performance, but overall, smooth. (7/10)

10 Steve & Karina – Steve dances like an Apple. He rolls around and is rotten to the core. By far, he was the worst of the night. Painful to watch. (3/10)

11 David & Kym – David and Kym ate up the floor, but the performance got a tad boring at times. David can move fairly gracefully and we like him, but he has to take himself more seriously for us to. Overall a commendable performance. (6/10)

12 Denise & Maks – Not happening for us. Denise was graceful in many ways, but just not in tune with the dance. We were not excited about the performance. (6/10)

13 Melissa & Tony – Melissa has dance training and it shows. She gets every move on point and, despite being a replacement and only having two days to prepare, she was on point and beautiful. Loved the performance, the outfit and the style. (8/10)

In order of score, with the worst first

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Gilles Marini and Cheryl Burke

1. Steve & Karina
2. Lawrence & Edyta
3. Steve-O & Lacey
4. Ty & Chelsie
5. David & Kym
6. Denise & Maks
7. Holly & Dmitry
8. Belinda & Jonathan
9. Shawn & Mark
10. Chuck & Julianne
11. Melissa & Tony
12. Lil’ Kim & Derek
13. Gilles & Cheryl

There you have it. The judges may have had it slightly different, but overall, we think everyone will agree, the first contestant to depart will have to “shuffle” out. Steve was awkward and comical to watch.