His Jennifer Lawrence is pretty good to be honest.
You’re just scared I’ll steal your girl.
1. “Are you sure?”
How you want to respond: I’ve been in a 10-year relationship with a girl and we’re thinking of getting married but yeah, maybe this is just a phase.
2. “So gusto mo maging lalaki?” (So you want to be a man?)
How you want to respond: News flash: I don’t have to be a man to love a woman.
3. “If you’ve only had lesbian sex, is it counted as real sex?”
How you want to respond: Well, if you count five orgasms in one night real, then yeah. sure.
4. “A vagina is only for a penis.”
How you want to respond: Tita, don’t tell me you’ve never heard of oral before.
5. “Eh sino’ng lalaki sa inyo?” (But who’s the man in the relationship?)
How you want to respond: We’re both girls. Because again, I like girls. That’s kind of the point in identifying as a lesbian.
6. “Hindi mo pa nahahanap yung lalaki na para sa’yo.” (You just haven’t found the right man yet.)
How you want to respond: I’m not looking for a man, nga!
7. “Sinaktan ka siguro ng lalaki before.” (You must have been hurt by a man before.)
How you want to respond: No, I didn’t become a lesbian because I was hurt by a man before. Liking women doesn’t have anything to do with men at all.
8. “Matakot ka nga sa Diyos.” (Be afraid of God!)
How you want to respond: Hay nako, Ma.
9. “Yan ba ang natutunan mo sa all-girls school?” (Is that what they teach you at that all-girls school?)
How you want to respond: We had strict math teachers and they didn’t have time to teach us how to be a lesbian. We were too busy acing our exams.
10. “You’re too pretty to be gay.”
How you want to respond: You’re just scared I’ll steal your girl.
11. “If you’re a lesbian, why are you wearing a skirt?”
How you want to respond: Because my clothes don’t define my sexual orientation, I do.
12. “If you’re dating a girl who looks like a boy, bakit hindi na lang lalaki?”
How you want to respond: My girlfriend can wear whatever she wants and be whoever she wants. Sorry not sorry that makes you feel weird.
13. “You’ll grow out of it, eventually.”
How you want to respond: Yeah, the rest of my life is just a phase. I’ll let you know when I start growing wings or something.
14. “Why do you hate men?”
How you want to respond: I mean, I can love men. I just don’t LAAAAAAB them, di ba?
15. “How do lesbians have sex?”
How you want to respond: Quite often, actually.
16. “Do you have sex toys?”
How you want to respond: To each their own; personally, I do just fine without.
17. “P’wede sumali?” (Can I join?)
How you want to respond: Can my girlfriend who’s trained in Krav Maga kick your ass?
18. “P’wede manood?” (Can I watch?)
How you want to respond: Again, dude – KRAV MAGA. Look it up.
19. “How are you gonna raise a family? Children need a mom and a dad.”
How you want to respond: Tell that to the single mom who’s been raising her kids since their father died.
20. “Do you know [insert name of random lesbian]?”
How you want to respond: My life isn’t The L Word, you know.
21. “Are you a fan of Charice? Tegan and Sara? Deuce Manila?”
How you want to respond: Just because I’m a lesbian doesn’t mean I’m automatically a fan of lesbian artists. (Pero yoooooo, Tegan and Sara though.)
22. “Why do you find Tom Hiddleston attractive if you’re a lesbian?”
How you want to respond: I mean, I have eyes too.
His Jennifer Lawrence is pretty good to be honest.
1. Meet Filipino TV host Paolo Ballesteros. He’s a media personality in the Philippines and he’s really, really, really into the Instagram makeup transformation game.
2. His favorite subject? Famous American female celebrities, including Ariana Grande:
3. Tyra Banks:
4. Jennifer Lawrence:
6. Taylor Swift:
7. Two kinds of Taylor swift, actually:
8. “Wrecking Ball”-era Miley Cyrus:
9. Megan Fox:
10. Katy Perry:
11. Pretty much anyone you can think of…
12. …He’s tried to pull off with his serious makeup skill.
If it’s named after a DreamWorks character, it has to adorable, right?
1. As you may or may not have heard, a rare megamouth shark washed up ashore in the Philippines.
People have been like, “OMG SO SCARY” and “JULES VERNE FEVER DREAM TBH,” but it’s kind of adorable actually?
2. Ready? This is what it looks like.
The dead megamouth shark was found in Pio Duran, Albay. It was nicknamed “Toothless,” after its resemblance to the character in the How to Train Your Dragon movies.
3. See? Cute!
4. But really, for a one-ton, fifteen-foot long creature from the deep, it’s really not all that bad.
Megamouths feed primarily on plankton in the deep sea, using its bioluminescent mouth (read: glowing jaws) to attract its prey. There have been 15 sightings of megamouths in the Philippines — second only to Japan — and Toothless is reportedly the 66th time a megamouth has been found.
5. (Just a reminder that the megamouth shark rubs fins with creatures like this, so it could be worse.)
6. Even scientists have difficulty believing that it’s a real creature. The species has been sighted so rarely that some still classify it as a cryptid.
The megamouth Toothless was brought over to the Philippines’ Bureau of Fisheries and Aquatic Resources (BFAR) to be examined and preserved.
7. R.I.P. Toothless.