Academy announces steps ‘to immediately increase diversity’

The Motion Picture Academy, “heartbroken”as more and more celebrities threaten toboycott this year’s awards ceremony to protest the unbearable whiteness of the nominees, is moving quickly to silence its critics. And by quickly, we mean really quickly. The Academy’s board of directors met Thursday night and voted on several new initiatives it hopes will double the number of women and diverse members of the Academy by 2020.

First, the Academy realized its policy of “voting membership for life” left it with a lot of old, white fat that couldn’t be trimmed. Newly inducted members will be given a 10-year term, which is renewable if considerations are met. The board also addedthree new term-limited governor seats“in order to immediately increase diversity on the Board of Governors.”

The Academy has alsolaunched a mysterious but“ambitious global campaign to identify and recruit qualified new members who represent greater diversity.”

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